I Still Want To Draw

Drawing has always been one of those things that gives me peace. Just… quiet. The kind of quiet that settles your mind without you even realizing it.

When I draw, I’m not thinking about school, deadlines, or anything stressful. It’s just me, my thoughts, and whatever I’m trying to create. And I like that. I like how simple it feels.

But lately, I haven’t had time. Or maybe I have, and I just haven’t had the energy. Because for me, drawing is not something I can force. I can’t just sit down and say, “Okay, let me draw now.” It doesn’t work like that. I draw when I feel it, when the idea comes, when my mind is quiet enough to enjoy it.

And that’s what makes it a little frustrating. Because I want to get better at it. Lately, I’ve even been thinking about trying new things. Mosaic. Painting. Just exploring more. But somehow, school always finds a way to take that time. Or maybe I let it.

Sometimes I look at some of my classmates and wonder how they do it. How they balance everything so well. School, social life, hobbies… everything. And here I am, trying to keep up with just one thing at a time. I won’t lie, I envy that. A little.

And then there’s this part I don’t always say out loud. Seeing drawings that are better than mine. People who can sketch humans so effortlessly, while I’m still struggling to get it right. I’m more comfortable with animations, but I want to grow beyond that. And sometimes, that gap between where I am and where I want to be feels… discouraging. But I don’t think it should be.

Because everyone starts somewhere. And maybe this is just my “learning slowly” phase. Maybe this is where I’m supposed to be. Still trying, still figuring it out, still not quite there yet… but not giving up either.

I still want to draw. I still want to get better. I still want to explore all the ideas sitting quietly in my head. So I guess for now, I’ll wait. Not in a lazy way, but in a patient way.

And hopefully… I figure it out.