4 Lessons I Learned From My Messy Friendships.

I asked someone, 'What do you think about the word "friendship"?' The response was "Love is Friendship." We all have different opinions about "friendship."

I recently came across a quote by Maya Angelou: "Friendship takes work. Finding friends, nurturing friendships, scheduling FaceTime - it all takes a tremendous amount of work. But it's worth it." I couldn't agree more; friendship does take a lot of work, and finding the right friends is just the beginning.

However, I must confess that friendship is an extremely sensitive and personal topic for me. Writing this blog takes a lot of effort and vulnerability on my part, as I've navigated numerous ups and downs in my own friendships,from friends who used me for their own entertainment to those who pretended to care but didn't truly value our relationship.

In fact, sharing my thoughts and experiences about friendship feels daunting, but I hope that by doing so, I can connect with others who may have faced similar challenges. So, here goes...

Through my experiences, I've learned some valuable lessons:

• Expect mistakes. 

Someone once reminded me "You're not perfect, and neither are your friends". Mistakes will happen, but it's how you learn from them that matters. So expect mistakes, but also expect growth. When mistakes happen, communicate openly, practice forgiveness and learn from the experience.

• Not everyone can be your friend. 

I've learned to accept this fact and avoid being a people pleaser. Instead, I focus on maintaining good relationships with everyone, even if we're not close friends. It's okay to have acquaintances and colleagues - don't force yourself on everyone.

• You know your true friends when you're going through tough times.

 They show up when you're happy and when you're struggling, correct your mistakes, and can even predict your mood from your text messages. Stick with those friends!

• Be considerate.

 True friends show up during both good and bad times, but sometimes they can't always be there. Remember that they have their own struggles too. Respect boundaries, honor your friends needs and limits. I've learned that sometimes you need to put yourself in your friends shoes. Be patient, understand that everyone has bad days. Also, be ready to adapt to changing circumstances.

Going back to Maya Angelou's quote mentioned earlier, Yes!, Friendship is worth it --- IF you find the right friend or permit me to say ...(true friends).

There's something I always say to myself " You can't do life alone, whether you like it or not, you'll need the help of friends".

As I reflect on my own friendships, I ask myself: "Am I a true friend?" "Do I show up during both good and bad times?" "What do my friends like and dislike about me?" I'll leave those questions for my friends to answer.

Friendship is a journey, and I'm excited to see what new lessons tomorrow brings.While I've shared four lessons I've learned so far, I'm aware that there's still much to explore. And I'm looking forward to embracing new experiences, challenges, and insights that will help me deepen my understanding of what it means to be a good friend.

Now, I'd love to hear from you: What personal experiences have you had with friendship, and what have you learned? Share your stories in the comment section below. 

Thanks!